- NOTES ON BODY DYSMORPHIA PART 1 -
Body dysmorphia is not just a fancy synonym for being insecure. Not to say that insecurities don’t play a part in the disorder, but body dysmorphia is having a “distorted image of one’s own body to an extent that interferes with their ability to live a normal life” — there’s a big difference there. •
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When my disorder first started, I fell into a trap. I tried to immerse myself in the fitness world and silently struggled because no one I saw ever talked about dealing with the same issues. So as someone on the outside looking in at Instagram influencers & fitness gurus, all I saw were seemingly happy people with perfect bodies living their best life. And all I wanted was to be one of those people. •
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So it began, day after day I would stare in the mirror so unhappy with what I saw. But I thought if I could just figure out the secrets the influencers & gurus had, I’d have the same body that I envied for years. So I researched & studied some of their routines, started taking supplements I’ve never heard of, ditching what they deemed unhealthy, and set out on this quest to look my best no matter the cost. •
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I did what I set out to do and lost weight rapidly, but why wasn’t I happy like everyone else? All I saw was a face that was too chubby for pictures, a body that wasn’t as fit as others, a stomach “unworthy” of a swimsuit, and a bunch of other lies I fed myself. •
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What I didn’t see was what was wrong with my thinking at the time. Why was I nitpicking the way I looked? Why was I pushing myself and body to be something it’s not? •
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Toast Tuesday brought to you by @mikeys cinnamon raisin English muffin topped with mashed avo, s&p, and crushed red pepper flakes 🤘❤️ ...
